Thursday, October 23, 2008

The real me

A lot of my friends have been asking me why so many people have been leaving me such unkind comments on my blog recently.  It is because I posted my political views on the side bar, and because I posted about having housekeeping clean up my sons throw up at our hotel.

I have always had a small readership, but because of a link posted on Cjanes blog to my blog,  I got a lot of traffic the other day from people I didn't know.

People said some really nasty things to me. Really nasty.  I will admit that it hurt.  I was judged very harshly from people who don't know me or anything about me.  Because of my political views and my "politically incorrect" sense of humor, they assumed the worst and sure let me know it.

I am a pretty fun loving, nice person.  I strive everyday to be the best wife and mother; my family is everything.  I am kind to all my neighbors, no matter their color. I am active in my community and my church.  I volunteer in the schools.  When I read others blogs, I encounter numerous things that I don't agree with.  Sometimes I even think they are lying.  Then I simply click the mouse and off I go, onto a new blog or website.   It is not my place to play policeman of the blog world and make sure everyone is being politically correct or posting only things that I agree with.

That's the beauty of the blog.  It's my voice.  Mine.  I was told - "Shame on me" and because of my connection to the Nie Nie blog, I should be more careful with what I say.  I love my cousin Christian and  his wife Stephanie.  But I was blogging long before their accident, and hope to be blogging long after.  I don't owe anything to anyone in the blogging community.  This is my place to share a part of me.  And like it or not - this is me in all my imperfect glory.

To leave nasty comments is silly.  It's not anyones job to put me in my place.  The blog is out there for you to read - agree or not - and if you like what you see, come back again. Obviously, if you don't, then don't.

Here's the bottom line.  This is my place to post new recipes that are yummy,  to post little tidbits about my family life and vacations, to post pictures of my latest cookie and cake creations, and yes, to even post my opinions.  It could be said that it is your right to leave a comment with yours, and I guess that is so.  But it will always be my right to delete them when they are unkind or nasty.  

I am a lover not a fighter and don't enjoy the controversy or arguing.   Come. Read. Enjoy.  If not, no hard feelings.



106 comments:

Anonymous said...

Amen! If people don't like it, stop reading it. I am really disliking our politically correct world because a few people make a lot of noise. It sounds like these people share the same views as the Senator from New Mexico that was talked about on Glenn Beck today. Maybe the Senator will include the blogging world in the "Fairness Doctrine" and we'll all have to include two sides to every post! I love your blog Melissa. Keep it up!

Jolene said...

I found your blog through cjane - which is funny because we are practically neighbors. I had an issue with some mean anonymous comments about a post I did on keeping the sabbath day holy and I wish I would have had the courage to do what you just did. Blog about it. Instead, I deleted the whole post.

I have loved getting to know you better through your blog. Your cakes and cookies are beautiful and so are you and your family. Long live the short bus! (I just found my journal that I kept on the trek - it made me laugh)

the Meehans said...

I also found your blog thru cjane and i am in love with your beautiful cookies and cakes! You are a very talented woman and to be able to make such beautiful creation and still have time for a family of 3 kids and a dog and a big house is certainly not easy! You are a super mom with a darling husband. Don't worry about those nasty comments and you are very brave to leave how you felt about those unkind words in your blog. I salute you and wish that we can be friends. I love your blog, your awesome creations, your delicious recipes, and your family photos. We don't know each other but I feel that I know you after following your blog. Keep up the good work!
from a LDS sister in Singapore:)

Anonymous said...

I found your blog through cjane as well. I just have to say that I think you are amazing... I love all the cake's, cookies, recipies ect. I love that you are willing to share with the rest of us. Do you ever give out decorating tips? Like the smooth icing on the cookies... I don't blame you if you don't, but really it takes talent too, so it probably wouldn't hurt your business in the least... Your are very talented and I admire all the things you stand for. Keep on being you!

Megan said...

I was wondering what all of that was all about! I tried hard to see how a cute little cookie could stir up such great emotion for being so politically incorrect! Glad to hear it wasn't the cookie, sorry to hear it was over political views and throw up. It's never fun to have your feelings hurt! Hats off to you for having the maturity to handle this appropriately. Delete and move on...with a smile! There will always be people with differing opinions in this crazy world we live in. We have to take the good with the bad I guess. It helps us learn and grow. You are a kind and generous person who has dedicated much of your time to help your cousin and his family during this very difficult time in their lives. Keep up the good work and the positive attitude! Now go to bed and catch up on some much needed sleep! I think your great!

Jessica said...

Hello, I to found you through cjane. I saw what you had on your sidebar and thought nothing of it. I really enjoyed looking at your cakes and cookies. We had a McCain sign in our front yard (we have a long driveway)I put the sign halfway up our driveway. My husband told me no one could see it so he put it right next to the road. The next day it was gone. It seems like in my neighborhood (town for that matter) all the McCain signs are being stolen or torn down. I think this has been one of the nastiest elections ever. I will hopefully be glad when it is over. For those nasty comments from people who have viewed your blog through cjane may I remind you how KIND AND CARING Stephanie is and how she would probably NEVER LEAVE HATEFUL WORDS ON ANYONES BLOG because of the caring sole she is!!!!Take care and don't let anyone take away your rights. I think the angry readers were afraid you might make people lean to McCain on election day who knows. Take care. Jess

Anonymous said...

Wow! I found you from cjane and after reading some of your posts you are now bookmarked. I enjoy your recipes and your humor. I especially cracked up about the Rusty the Kleenix one!!!!! I am one of those people that if I like your blog, I will read it, and if I don't like it, I will move on.

And your cakes and cookies look awesome!!!

Anonymous said...

how irritably rude that some jerk would leave such nasty comments on your blog. i am still amazed at the cookies that you made of christian and stephanie--AMAZING!!!! i just found your blog (yep, through cjane) and i found it to be wonderful. you are beautiful and talented and so is your family. i wouldn't have removed the sidebar. (i am assuming it was a mccain button?) keep it up. it is your blog and who cares--it's your business. don't back down from a twit. anyway, these are just my thoughts from nancy in va.
ps how do you keep such a great figure while baking such delicacies???? :)

Anonymous said...

Im glad you spoke up and defended yourself. We need to stand up for what we believe in and not let someone else tell us what we can. People wonder why this world is so messed up, this election has turned into one of the most hateful elections I have seen, it has brought out so many mean and hateful things in people, it makes me scared for our Country. You can't let these people keep you from posting your good believes. Keep up the good work, your blog is awesome.

Lisa P said...

I hate that people become such idiots when it comes to politics. I probably don't share your political views, but you know what-that's okay. It doesn't matter to me. I feel we are all entitled to them-that's what a democracy is all about. Anyway, I just wanted to look at your cakes, and they are AMAZING. Keep blogging. The world's much more interesting when we are not all the same anyway.

holt family said...

I hope you keep this blog open to us lurkers. I can't wait to make the pumpkin cookies. I am so sorry that you had to endure ugliness. I would have been extremely hurt, too. Anyway, I look forward to trying your beautiful cookies at the concert tomorrow. They are almost too beautiful to eat. I am in Christian and Stephanie's ward, and I hope I get to meet you. We will be there in force.

Reenie said...

I too found you thru CJane. I think you are beautiful and a very loving and giving person. I know the words hurt you, but please ignore those ********!!

Your cakes are absolutely beautiful. If I lived near you, I would definitely be ordering one.

Your cookies are darling.

God Bless you and your family for helping Steph & Christian.

I love your picture of you and your family. Cute.

Lorena

Reenie said...

Forgot to tell you too, that your blog is in my favorites:)

meg said...

I also found your blog through Cjane. I have enjoyed reading it and enjoyed making your pumpkin cookies yesterday. They were a huge hit! Thanks so much for sharing the recipe and your life. Keep up the good work!

dina said...

Good for you! I am not sure how I found you exactly, but I love love love all of your creative work...I even e-mailed you regarding more information for my wedding. I know there are some nasty people out there, but I do believe that there are more good people than bad, and I encourage you to continue to speak your mind!

The Kriloff Klan said...

Amen sista! Very well put! I enjoy reading your blog because of who you are. I enjoy you as a person & I am thankful you are in my life. I can hear you telling your stories & every time I smile! I enjoy you as a person & am glad you call me friend!

Melanie said...

AMEN!

elizabeth bryant said...

our family knows you love christian & steph - it's obvious by the hard work you and mel put into the cookies! anyone that has the gall to say that you should be careful what you say - can immediately stop being a part of this whole nienie family. just like jessica said, stephanie would never leave something rude or hurtful one someone's blog (or say, do, gossip, etc.) and isn't that what we admire about her?

this is making my blood boil, so I should stop. I love you! keep blogging away and making me laugh!

Jenn said...

It is absolutely ridiculous that someone would leave nasty comments or tell you that, since you have close ties to Nie that you shouldn't post certain things! Since you are in the family you're not allowed to have an opinion anymore??? I don't think so. Good for you for sticking up for yourself. I did just recently find your blog through cjane, and I'm really enjoying it so far. Keep up the good work!!

Kyle said...

I can't believe that someone would leave hurtful or negative comments! You are a good person and don't deserve that! I love your blog and that you share your opinions...keep it up!

Laurie said...

You can delete this if you want Melissa (don't mean to bring up the controversy!) but I just had to laugh out loud when I thought of that girl telling her husband, "I went on this girl's blog today and she called our dear presidential candidate Barack HUSSEIN Obama!!" and then him going "um, dear, that IS his middle name." So if you're out there, my dear uneducated reader, get a clue and learn the middle name of your candidate!!!

Beth said...

Excellently expressed!

You go, girl!

Britany said...

Beautiful post! I am glad the mean, hurtful comments won't stop you from blogging! I love to read your posts! You are a wonderful mom and have a wonderful family!

Sarah said...

You're great Melissa!

On a sidenote, Mark and I both thought the picture of you family, was OUR family - at first glance. That's funny.

My crazy crazy life said...

I also found your website thru the cjane website which I found thru the nie nie website. I love your blog and think you're funny! Don't let those people bother you...they sound unhappy anyways. Stay happy and stay YOU!

Chantri said...

I linked you for the first time through CJane the other day so I must of been one in the traffic. I didn't leave a comment, but truly thought you were amazing. Now I feel like I should have told you how talented you were. I am glad you came out and spoke about this issue. It takes one cruel & selfish person to bring down a blogging community because they can't respect someone else's view on things. So shame on the person/people who left rude comments.
So you are amazing, SO talented, and wonderful and I just met your blog days ago (and have you on my bloglines because you are such an inspiration!). Keep on keepin' on. Us bloggers love you!

Jodi-SugarPlumStitches.com said...

PERFECTLY said...

Laurel said...

I'm proud to be your friend. Even more proud today. And I add a hearty amen to everything you said. As Nike once advertised: "If you ain't you, you ain't anybody."

Love to you!

Halvorsen Family said...

Isn't it great to see all the blog-allies you have acquired? It just goes to show you that we need to stick together. I, too, feel bad for the negative feelings others have thrust upon you. (It makes you wonder about the political candidate they're supporting???) Oh, I guess there are zealots in every crowd, but sheesh... give me a break. Anyway, I found your blog one fine day while searching for a recipe months ago and have enjoyed it ever since. Now...about making the icing smooth on those cookies....???? And how the heck did you do those silohettes so perfectly? Hold to the rod, Melissa!! The big and spacious building is just going to keep getting bigger! You're great. :)

Heather C. said...

Wow, I was wondering what that was all about! Some people are amazingly controlling and thrive on conflict. I like you Melissa, and I'm glad you're not a conflict kind of girl :) Don't censor yourself to please the antagonistic few.

Cafe Johnsonia said...

Well said. I made my personal blog private after some mean comments. I wish I'd had your courage.

(I also found you through cjane, like so many others.)

Shari Goodman said...

I am more than grateful to call Melissa my sister in law. She is an amazing person and I love her like she was my sister from birth. I hate these people out there who think that they have any right to belittle people they don't even know. Yes, they can read, yes, they can comment, but.... being rude only reflects on the person commenting. Besides, if you must make a stupid comment, at least be educated about it. Love you Melissa!

KresserKlan said...

I also saw your blog thru Cjane which I have been reading for sometime now. I enjoy your cakes and cookies. I usually dont leave comments on peps blogs unless I know them BUT I have to tell you my funny experience. I linked onto a blog that was linked on another persons blog etc, you know how that goes.. so I didnt know the person but I read her blog a few times & she was funny etc..Then the last blog she posted said that she was glad it was Halloween and it was "her Holiday" and began to explain her religion, (lets just say it went right along with the Halloween theme).and . I was like ohhhhh....my... thats not my style. So I deleted the linq to her blog & I just wont read it again. I didnt write any bashing remarks because that is why we live in America, HELLO!!!! So we can worship how we please. If I were to leave my opinions on her blog that is all they are "my opinions" I just chose not to read it any more.

Sara said...

Beautifully said, Melissa. I feel that my blog is all about me. Besides my own home, it is the only place that I can totally celebrate myself and my family. It is my place to write about what I want, when I want. I love politics and have often considered posting about some things that are important to me. Unlike you, I was a coward. I know that my views differ in many ways from most of the people I associate with in the blogging community and I didn't want to get any of those nasty comments either. Only once did I get a long and uncalled-for comment on my blog and I took great pleasure in hitting that delete button. I hope you did,too!

Lauren said...

I found your blog through cjane as well but I have to agree whole heartedly with this post. I never understood why someone would leave a nasty comment to someone.

I am sorry there are some mean people out there. I hope they go away.

Emily said...

I, too, am a blog-hopper who doesn't know you but feels for you. I first found your blog when I saw those absolutely incredible cookies that you made. I don't live in Arizona, but if I did, I would come to that concert, buy a few cookies and frame them because they are works of art! You are so talented.

Bless you for being you and stating your mind and opinions. Do people forget that we live in America?!? That we are able to have our own brains and express our own opinions?!? You sound amazing to me, and thanks for letting me be uplifted from you (even if I don't know you).

Anna said...

You go girl! I found your blog through someone's. I'm not quite sure who's, but it was probably CJanes. I did bid/win a softie quilt from Sarah and I was a guest post on Nie's. Anyhow,I have saved your blog as a fav because I love your posts. I love your creativity and your wit. You give me hope that maybe one day I'll be able to decorate beautiful cakes like yours. Chances are probably not, but your blog makes think I can and so I dream away with every visit. I am sorry that you had negative comments. Sometimes I think people have nothing better to do with their time than to pick away at others. You seem like an amazing woman and I am so glad that you haven't made your blog private. Thank you for inspiring us and for sharing your tender spirit.
Anna

Anonymous said...

i apologize sincerely

Angie said...

This is your blog and you should be able to share your feelings. That is one of the things I like most about you! Put your political signs back up. You are an intelligent woman and have a right to be proud of your beliefs.

Kristen Duke Photography said...

I've lurked for a while and linked from cjane and I'm sorry you got such hurtful comments. I think you do amazingly beautiful cakes, you have such talent!

Ashley said...

I just found your blog from a link to your gorgeous Nie Nie cookies--wow they are incredible!!! I read this post and totally agree. I have felt the need to delete comments (even from my own family) for various reasons and have made people mad by doing so. I love this post--we totally have the right to control what ends up on our blogs! I don't understand people who leave nasty comments, esp. when they are so gutless that they go by "anonymous." Keep up your good posts and beautiful cookies and cakes!

Ashley Vaerst said...

First I want to say I love the blog. I found you the same way most did - via cjane. I am now itching to make Christmas sugar cookies - which may turn into Halloween sugar cookies.

Second I want to say that I have made house keeping clean up my kids puke too. Do not worry about it. I laughed hard at that post and thought "I am not the only one".

Keep your chin up.

Jill said...

Well said...and good for you. I've read your blog for awhile and don't even know how I found you. This is a great post...kudos for you for standing up for yourself and doing so in such a classy way.

briansarahannah said...

I'm glad to see you have so much support. I love your blog; it is so much fun. I always look forward to seeing new posts.
I hope the authors of certain comments will think twice before they write something hurtful.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The Cutchen Crew said...

Your Awesome and I consider you one of my Best NEIGHBORS, opps I mean friends. Obivously those comments came from people who dont really know you.

Anonymous said...

Who cares? This is her blog and she can post how she wants. Don't come here and criticize. Did you get a "personal" invitation to visit and leave comments? She is an amazing person and has lots of class. I think if you had any courage you'd leave a link to your blog. Just some advice when you visit another blog in the future - if you don't like what you are seeing or reading then click and move on to the next.

From Anonymous! (Now aren't YOU curious.)

tessaraye said...

Your site is wonderful! Keep posting your opinions because we love to read em!

Sunshine said...

Melissa I love your blog! It is always fun seeing what amazing projects you are up to. I appreciate your positive attitude, honesty and humor...keep it up!

Jamie and Heather Darger said...

I love your blog...and your talent. I was wondering if there was more info on ordering your cakes and photos or pricing. You are so talented!

Anonymous said...

You go girl! I believe that whatever you decide to write about is okay and to share it with your blog readers is even better. I am a cjane reader, and I have different views than you, but that is what makes the world go around. You are talented and make beautiful cakes and cookies. Wow, you've come a long way from your first cake...(the rainbow decor was very pretty). Keep up the baking, great stories and please keep enjoy writing in your blog as much as I enjoy reading it!

Julia said...

Thank you for your blog. I also found you through cjane and looked around your blog for over an hour one morning when I really should have been on with my day. The next day I made some pumpkin bars and I thought of how your kitchen must be with all of the goodies you make all the time. Then I thinking as I was mixing with my small mixer that you probably have a nice kitchen aide or something to that effect. As I got the flour out of my large plastic bucket and reloaded my smaller one in my kitchen, (which I've done for years) I was happy to know that's what you do as well. You are extremely talented, in writing, baking, cooking, decorating, sharing with all us and since I don't really know, I'm sure there are countless talents that I'm missing here. I was surprised to read today that there are negative comments. I would never think to do such a thing...How sad for those who can't just move on. Your blog is in my bookmarks. Thank you for making my life brighter every day.
PS... I loved the throw-up in the hotel. How I would have loved just once to have someone else launder my kids throw up...especially the time when I was home only one day from the hospital after the delivery of my 5th child. (I had been in ICU for 3 days after an emergency hysterectomy and had been given 65 YES sixty-five units of blood to keep me alive.) Child #4 had thrown up in his sleeping bag (he'd given up his bed for grandma, who was there "helping" us. EVERYBODY acted like if they touched the sleeping bag they would get the plague. So I drug it down two flights of stairs and put it in the washing machine. Where's a hotel when you need one?

Debbie said...

That's why I'm going private!
Not that people left bad comments but there are alot of crazy people out there!! LOL
I know that my friends will be reading and thats all I care about :)

Debbie said...

I check out your blog every once in a while to see what your baking and get a chuckle. Other people should really get a life themselves if they can't seem to get along with people on blogger. Geesh, has it really come to that! You say whatever you gosh darn wanna say. I think we've all made our point by supporting you. We all love it, so please don't stop because there's a few knuckleheads out there.

celilo said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Tasha said...

I am so glad that you posted about your experience with nasty comments. It seems that these days people yell about being tolerant of others but really they mean that they should be allowed to say whatever thay like and that anyone who disagrees is a "hatemonger". I don't normally leave comments but I am seeing more and more of this "backwards tolerance" and it is driving me crazy.
You have a lovely blog and are very talented. I had a friend make your pumpkin cookies for an activity and they were delicious! That frosting was soooo good. I will be making these for my kids for Halloween day treats.

cathy said...

I came because of NieNie but I read because of you. You are an articulate, talented woman and I enjoy reading your opinions (whether I agree or not). Keep up the good work. The real you is just fine!

Rosie said...

I have been looking at your incredible cakes! I wish that you lived close to me! I would love to learn how to make something so beautiful.

I did notice one of your cake stands. It is a white round with polka dots. Where do you find something like that?

Jenn said...

I hope you know how grateful I am for your blog! I have learned many things and just like your friendship it has enriched my life. I love the real you!

Becky said...

I have been a blog reader for sometime now, thru Shari's. I love your blog. Keep all the great stuff coming! I can't wait to buy some of those cookies tonight!

Katherine said...

I found you through cjane's blog... and if it helps I absolutely LOVE your blog. I really enjoy baking and trying new recipes and looking at your amazing cookies is defintely inspiration. Thank you for blogging and being you!

Kate said...

I just found your blog and you easily are my new favorite! Your cookies and cakes are unbelievable!

Just wanted to let you know that you have a new fan :)

Emmie {orange + barrel} said...

I've been reading your blog for awhile now because it was linked to Liz's blog. I love all of your cakes!! Good for you for standing up for yourself. It's your space and you can say whatever you want. I am a super liberal, Obama supporter and I think if you support McCain, than rock it out. It's your blog.

Anonymous said...

I went to the concert last night- which was awesome. And I bought six of your cookies and popcorn. It was delicious! Thank you!

Connie H said...

Your cookies are FABULOUS and your cakes are FABULOUS!

I also whole heartedly agree with your comments...this is your blog and you should not hesitate to post your thoughts and feelings. If people don't like it, they can just move on!

Also, I am very bugged by any suggestion that you should be more cautious because of Nie Nie...come on! You have done so much to support her cause! Although I only know her thru her blog, there have been several times when she has posted her thoughts and feelings! I don't think she would begrudge anyone the right to do the same!

Keep it up! I am now a regular visitor!

Rick, Debi, and Loni said...

I just wanted to agree with all you have said. It is YOUR blog and your opinions. I actually like to read others blogs whether I know them or not, just for that reason. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog and your thoughts as well as your opinions. I have never taken any offense, nor should anyone else. I hope you don't let this affect your posts from here on because the reason I read your blog is for your beliefs, opinions, and great humor. Keep in up!

Betsy's girl said...

Good for you! It is very sad that people are so unhappy that they have to spread such negativity in the most inappropriate ways. You handled it very well, with the same grace and class that is evident throughout your blog. Share on...
(p.s. did they expect you to steal the barf sheets so you could take them home and wash them yourself?!)

Anonymous said...

well i dont really get why nie nie would be upset anyhow, isnt she a mccain supporter anyways?

i digress, i am so happy i found your blog so now i can gaze at your cookies and cakes all day! i hope you froze a couple of those cookies to give to steph and christian later. :)

Pink Slippers said...

That was soooo perfectly said. I like what you said about it being your blog and move on if you don't like it. Very true. I did find yours through C Jane too.
By the way the cookies rock! You did a beautiful job. Wendy
(Mommy to six Sweeties)

Anonymous said...

i noticed that you removed 3 comments. i was able to read them in my email, because i "subscribed" to the comments of this post. well the 3 comments that you deleted were not offensive, rude, or "nasty" in my opinion, so i was thinking that if THAT is what you call "very nasty," then you must be very easily offended. however, you seem like a very kind, honest, strong-willed woman. i'm sure you never wanted to make a controversy. however, i believe this post just added fuel to the fire. and you seem very smart, so it makes me wonder why you would have done that...

Morgan said...

I agree with the previous comment. I also got a chance to read those deleted comments and I did not think that they were rude. I agree with everything that you said in your post. It is yor personal space and you have every right to post as you please, but you must realize that everyone has a right to their opinions. You said that yourself, and that you had the right to remove rude, nasty comments. If that is true, then why did you remove those comments? They were not, in my opinion, rude or nasty.

I have no doubt that you are a kind, fun-loving person. Your blogs refelcts that. I can see that you are a creative, beautiful person, inside and out. There's no need to let these comments get to you the way that they have. It is clear to me that those commentors meant no harm. They were kindly stating their opinions.

Melissa said...

I didn't think the last comments were nasty either. I just really wanted to keep this post light and I still felt like they were just trying to fuel the fire a little. I wasn't offended. I felt like those were the type of people that should probably move along. Thanks for reading!

Megan said...

Respectfully, this is Melissa's blog. You have a right to leave your opinion, she reserves the right to delete them. Good or bad, nasty or not. If it truly does bother you so bad that Melissa is deleting these posts then maybe it's time for to agree to disagree and move on to another blog. Good luck to you.

Megan said...

How did the cookie sales go? Do you have any left over? I was serious about you shipping some out here....even if they might be a little crunchy by the time they arrive! Let me know! I will pay shipping costs. :)

Morgan said...

Megan, I believe that you may have misunderstood my comment. I didn't mean it that way. I was really just concerned, thinking that Melissa was offended by those comments, and that she felt that she was being attacked. I didn't think that she needed to worry about that, because I didn't think that those people were trying to be rude or nasty to her. It sounds as though Melissa understood what I was saying, and I was relieved to hear that she was not offended.

Megan said...

Sorry Morgan, sometimes I read too quickly. Melissa is a strong woman and can hold her own. She's my sister in law so naturally I want to come to her defense. No hard feelings and thanks for clarifying.

Our Family said...

guilty-
I found so many great blogs through CJane- great decorating ideas and now a pumpkin cookie that I have to try. It never dawned on me that some people would lash out and spread negitivity. I guess I thought everyone following the Nie Nie efforts was super nice and open. I admire that you are going to keep on blogging. I have a strange sense of humor and people who don't know me, could come on my blog, and not understand my statements. I have been blasted for my bio-medical thoughts on treatments for my son with Autism. I just Delete and move on. Those came from googler's by happenstanse. By the same meathods I have met some random mom's who feel the same way and are a greaet support, so I blog on. Please BLOG on. We are sending good vibes your way.

Anonymous said...

Hi Melissa,

I am not one of those who left a nasty comment--or any comment at all--last week. I also didn't have a chance to see the comments in question, so I'm not sure if you deleted them because they were overtly nasty or because you simply don't want to deal with politics on your blog. I'll take a chance that the latter is not true, and that you'd be willing to read what I have to say and maybe even start a respectful dialogue.

I know that this is your blog, your little corner of the web, and you might not want to talk politics. But I figured I might as well try! I've become totally obsessed with the election--it's practically all that my friends and I talk about right now!--so sometimes it's hard for me to get it through my thick skull that not everyone shares my delight this kind of conversation. So of course I understand if you feel more comfortable deleting this comnent.

Just so you know where I am coming from, I am a proud resident of what Sarah Palin would probably call "fake America." I live in New York City, consider myself a social liberal (though I'm an economic moderate), and am not religious at all.

I've also fallen in love with your amazing family over the past month, and love to read the blogs of everyone in the Clark and Nielson families who are connected to Stephanie and Christian. Even though I've occasionally seen things on them that I don't agree with, I am interested in learning more about what it means to be a stay-at-home-mom, a devout LDS, and a member of such a big family.

Still, I'll admit to a moment of consternation when I clicked through from Cjane's blog to yours and found that sidebar about Barack Obama. (As for the clam chowder, I thought the post was funny and can't for the life of me understand why people got on your case about it! Isn't the reason for staying in a hotel to have housekeeping clean up your mess, unpleasant as it may be?) Although I support Obama, I definitely understand that there are some valid reasons why people might support McCain--he is an honorable guy with an interesting life story. And yes, you are right that Obama's full name is Barack Hussein Obama. I'd imagine that he is proud of his middle name, because he is proud of his Kenyan heritage. It's a very common name in the Middle East, derived from the Semitic word "hasan," which means "good." "Husayn" is the affectionate form. Sure it belonged to a pretty nasty guy, but it has also belonged to great kings, warriors, and artists throughout history. I am also proud that a man who might be our next president has a name that is Arabic in origin. I think that President Barack Hussein Obama will send a clear signal to nations and people in the Middle East that we are friends, that we are a country that includes everyone, that the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are truly wars against Al Quaeda and not the Middle Eastern people, and that a young boy with a Muslim name can one day be elected to be the leader of the free world. That is what America is all about, and I find it beautiful.

Now, I totally agree with you that there's nothing wrong with talking about this name. I just spent some time doing so! But the way you said in a rather derisive way that you will not be voting for "Barack HUSSEIN Obama" made it seem like you were singling "Hussein" out as a reason not to vote for the guy. I don't think that's quite fair. Maybe you don't like his views on abortion or gun control, but why should his name be important? That implies that maybe you dislike the name because it is an Arabic name that many Muslims have held. But although Obama is a Christian, what if he were a Muslim? Would that mean he should not be president? What if Mitt Romney's name had been Brigham Young Romney? Would it have been fair for people to make fun of him and refuse to vote for him because it so clearly telegraphed his Mormon heritage?

Moreover, combining that with a discussion of Obama not saluting the flag makes it seem like you are maybe impugning his patriotism, and that you are connecting his perceived lack of patriotism to his middle name. But is there a reason why a black man with a name like Barack Hussein Obama can't love his country just as much as a white man with a name like John Sidney McCain? Moreover, it's patently untrue that Obama won't salute the flag or say the Pledge of Allegiance. He habitually does both (although he has said that the reason that photo caught him without his hand on his heart was because his grandfather, a WWII veteran, taught him to sing during the Anthem and put his hand on his heart during the Pledge; the anthem was playing then). He has led the Pledge at many of his rallies.

Anyway, I personally don't care if my president engages in any of these displays of patriotism (flag pins, etc.). For me, it is more important that he is a good leader. I myself refused to say the Pledge during most of my school days; I was born free as a citizen of this great nation, and I didn't like the feeling of being coerced into an insincere pledge of loyalty. Part of why I am proud to be an American is that in America, people aren't forced to pledge loyalty to anything.

Anyway, thank for listening Melissa! I think your baked goods are beautiful and hope you continue to blog. Please take this note in the spirit it was meant--a respectful discussion-opener, rather than a nasty remark meant to shut down discussion.

Best wishes,
Anne

Mark & Ashley said...

Amen! I enjoy reading your blog! Don't worry about what they say - you're great the way you are!
-Ashley

Kristi said...

I found you through cjane and I just wished you were in Chicago so you cold make birthday cakes for my girls!

You are one talented woman. :)


And phooey to cowards who hide behind "anonymous" to share their opinions. It's your blog. Say what you want.

Beth said...

Hi Jessica! I love your blog! That is lame you are getting mean comments. I guess people have nothing better to do with their time. . . I'm glad I got to meet you at the concert the other night. Your cookies were amazing! If you still want the chocolate cookie recipe, I'd love to email it to you. Just let me know. My email is bethall@gmail.com
Have a great day!

Anonymous said...

i was one of the posters who had their comments deleted. i wasn't trying to be rude, melissa, so i'm sorry if you took what i said that way. i think you are a great lady and are all around wonderful.

one of the other posters said something about none of us who disagreed receiving a personal invitation to post here. well, yes we did. this is a public blog that allows anonymous comments. that's the invitation. end of story.

i agree with what anne said. for some of us the focus on the HUSSEIN middle name is very troubling. there is a dangerous tide taking over our country right now where fear is being used to influence the way people think and act. again, and i'm NOT trying to be rude, but when you post something on a public blog you can't expect everyone to agree with you or for people who disagree to not say anything. if this blog is only for people who hold the same political beliefs as you do, then you need to make it private. until then, anyone and everyone can comment on what you write. AGAIN, i'm not trying to be rude!!! i think this is a conundrum that all bloggers face.

i'm glad some other posters didn't think my remarks were rude. i wasn't trying to cause problems. in fact, i thought this would be a nice and safe place to express my concerns about the current election season. i'm sorry for my misconception.

best to you and your family. you have a beautiful life.

ZippityDoDaw said...

Good for you, standing up for your voice. I just found you through CJane, I have to admit. It is unbelievable that people can be rude and harsh. I love finding new people and getting a glimpse into their world through their thoughtful blogs. It should never be necessary to delete a blog, I have done it out of fear of offending, and it was a heartfult thoughtful post. I hope you can stay an open blog, because you are amazing! :) Beautiful cakes too!

ZippityDoDaw said...

Good for you, standing up for your voice. I just found you through CJane, I have to admit. It is unbelievable that people can be rude and harsh. I love finding new people and getting a glimpse into their world through their thoughtful blogs. It should never be necessary to delete a blog, I have done it out of fear of offending, and it was a heartfult thoughtful post. I hope you can stay an open blog, because you are amazing! :) Beautiful cakes too!

Alanna said...

I also found you through CJane and I thoroughly enjoyed each post I read. :) I love your pics of the cookies and cakes too! Keep them coming! Bless you! - Alanna, Washington DC

Erynn said...

Ditto on coming here from CJane. I have been so impressed at how a whole extended family has come together to help a wonderful couple. This is truly what families are supposed to be about, and your efforts are an inspiration to many. Your cakes and cookies are amazing too, I envy your talent!

Anonymous said...

Melissa, isn't it funny how someone can tell you your wrong for posting your political views, then they feel it necessary to post theirs. They have double standards, they should be attacking the media for all the lies that they say, they are not fare in their views either. I don't believe a word Obama says, that my choice.

Jen said...

You go girl! Don't let anyone tell you what to think or say! That's why we live in America. And by the way, I am WAY jealous of your creativity!

Anonymous said...

Anonymous posted " i thought this would be a nice and safe place to express my concerns about the current election season. i'm sorry for my misconception."

Isn't that what you thought when you started your blog and added your creative, clever and witty posts...that this would be a safe place to do so? That's what I thought when I started my blog. We blog to express ourselves and write about our lives, funny moments, tender moments, great recipes, decorating, our beliefs, our thoughts, ways to save, vacations, our political views, our relationships, and ....the list goes on and on.

If she really only wanted to express her concerns about the current election, then why didn't she just blog about it on her own blog and invite you and all your lurkers to her blog to read about it? She would have made more of an impact doing it that way.

She wished you "a beautiful life". Maybe that means she has finally moved on. I'm sure we all wish her a beautiful life as well.

Please continue to blog away. There are so many of us who obviously love your blog.

Shirley said...

I'll admit it--I was on that bus from cjane's with all these other people...LOL. As for the negative comment--isn't that kind of like coming to your home and whining about your decor choices or you kids being noisy or your dog having a cold nose? Hmmph! 2 words to her......BUH-BYE! I think you're a swell lady with a kind heart. Keep on being who you are, please! (Shirley)

Bryce and Candice Blood Family said...

Ha ha, I was just going to say AMEN SISTER and obviously I am not the only one. Somehow I don't think someone could squash your sassiness and oh how I love sassy loving people. I have three, ages 6, 4, and 1...my husband tells me he knows where they get it! Speak your mind and be you!

Gramma Betsy said...

Thanks for a wonderful Blog Melissa. Love you and your whole family (loved Jeff first, though!) Love, Aunt Betsy

Kim said...

Good for you! I get so tired of people leaving nasty comments on people's blogs.

Your cookies and cakes are beautiful--I was thrilled to find your site from cjane's the other day. I have forwarded it on to my friends. Please keep sharing.

lundgrenville said...

Hey Melissa-

Wow, I am in disbelief with the comments left that were innapropriate. Might I suggest that you moderate your comments...you can read them before they are posted.
I have to admit, this has been the nastiest elections ever. And quite frankly, Im not so sure that either candidates deserves a place in the White house. Our country is about respecting others, and truly...Im not so sure either of them have that quality. Why do the candidates running need to badger the other, to find the acceptance of the American people.
What ever happened to being true, honest, loving, kind & respectful?!
As for the craigslist commenters, blogs may not be private, but respect is always suggested when leaving a comment. Lets treat others like we want to be treated rather than finding their faults. Heck, none of us are perfect, and until then....we shouldnt have anything to say negative about others until we perfect ourselves.
Peace & Love is the way to go...It sure makes our household run smoother.
Hugs to all-

Katy said...

Unbelieveable how people can be. that is terrible. Your blog is great and I enjoy reading it. Thanks for sharing!

Summer said...

Well said Melissa! Don't listen to those people! You are awesome!

Tay said...

you're amazing! I wish i'd found you to make my cake when i was getting married... Perhaps for my sister... :)

Everybody is entitles to their own opinions and on blogs nobody has to express things to please everybody. I hope the nasty comments stop soon!

Rosemary said...

I wanted to comment on Lizzy's blog (where I found the link to your blog) but I can't since I don't have a Google ID.. I am definitely one of those not very computer savvy people!!! BUT.. I just read your last few entries.. and I love your blog! I find your blog interesting.. funny.. and a new 'keeper'.

I found your family after seeing a story on Stephanie and Christian on the Today Show. It has been so uplifting to see a family - sisters, brothers, parents, cousins, inlaws... etc etc. - pull together and help each other.

It is amazing to me that people think that they have the right to post anonymous nasty comments... if they don't like what they see or read, they should just move on!! It takes alot of courage to say what you think on your blog, and you are certainly not hiding who you are. I guess that there will always be 'trolls' on the internet, but what bothers me is that they may cause people to change their blogs to private.. and I love to read them! I've been loving reading the blogs of your family members.. not sure what's up with that but each and every one of you are amazing writers.. I can barely string two sentences together. I love to read Alice's site.. and was appalled to see someone question why she wasn't at the concert. What business is it of anyones? Why shouldn't she be entitled to continue to live her life, to balance her life? I think that she handled it very well, she dealt with it and moved on.. and I can't tell you how grateful most of us are to have a place to read updates, to see how things are going. There are so many people out here in cyber-land who have learned to love your family (all amazing).. to care what happens to Christian and Stephanie.. and we appreciate that you have let us peek into your private lives. We are very different in alot of ways.. but the same in others. Thank you for letting us in.. most of us truly care and appreciate it.

cristie said...

sorry sweetie that you have had to put up with some baloney.
but, you are one tough cookie and i am glad you stand up for yourself. ((((hugs)))) and yeah for you! xox

Sashay~Vanessa said...

I am a friend of Shari's. I rarely leave post because people are not very nice and sometimes do not think before they speak and I do not like to get caught up in there nastiness. It has been sitting on my heart and I just had to let you know I think you express your self in a very kind way and express life just how it is. When you write and others in your family write you can feel your love and goodness and know you touch peoples lives in ways you may never know.I am so sad for people who do not posses the same happiness in there life and are not nice.Keep blogging and keep sharing your true kind self. By the way I LOVE YOU CAKES!!!!
Vanessa

Sashay~Vanessa said...

I am a friend of Shari's. I rarely leave post because people are not very nice and sometimes do not think before they speak and I do not like to get caught up in there nastiness. It has been sitting on my heart and I just had to let you know I think you express your self in a very kind way and express life just how it is. When you write and others in your family write you can feel your love and goodness and know you touch peoples lives in ways you may never know.I am so sad for people who do not posses the same happiness in there life and are not nice.Keep blogging and keep sharing your true kind self. By the way I LOVE YOU CAKES!!!!
Vanessa

TX Girl said...

I saw those unbelievable cookies and had to come and see what kind of creative wizard lovingly made those babies.

I'm sorry people are nasty. I think it is easy to provide commentary when you don't know the person outside of their blog and can type it from the comforts of your home.

Hope all the drama is behind you.

PS thanks for sharing how you made the cookies.

TX Girl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pam said...

I agree 100%. I am so sorry that people felt the right to attack you for your opinions and feelings that you posted on your own blog.

Since I have been pretty vocal about the marriage amendment issue I received a bunch of hate-comments on my public blog. It started draining me emotionally so I just disabled comments until after the election is over. I just can't believe some people think that mean comments are ever appropriate. I don't mind it when people share a differing opinion when it is shared maturely and when they don't call me bad names. And my personal pet peeve is when people don't have the guts to leave their name and they just put "anonymous."

At any rate, good for you. I like the real you.

Amy said...

I was happy to find you through CJane's blog, too. Because I love cake decorating and yours have been so fun to look at.

 
BLOG DESIGN BY DESIGNER BLOGS